Thoughts on a comment policy

Thoughts on a comment policy

I’ve never had a comment policy on here, other than an unwritten “be nice”. That has worked well enough for the last 2+ years, but there have been flare ups, especially when there is a a Kate drought. Honestly, it seems like people go a bit stir crazy when Kate disappears for long stretches. This has happened several times in the last 2+ years. As I said, my unwritten “be nice” comment policy has worked well enough, but lately I’ve noticed that there have been more flare ups in the comment section. Maybe this is due to the increased unhappiness with Kate, maybe this is due to the Kate drought of late, I don’t know, it could be a number of things.

When I started this blog, I told myself that I would not censor comments. One of the reasons I started this blog in the first place was because my comments on a certain Kate site were constantly being moderated out. So I told myself I would let all comments through, including ones that were negative toward me. And I’ve gotten some of those, and let them through. There have been times when I outright censored comments, but there haven’t been that many.

I now feel like I’ve been a let down as a moderator due to my non-censorship. There have been several times when arguments in the comment sections have gone too far and gotten too heated, and I have not intervened when I should have. Either I didn’t think it would get that heated, thought people would be able to work things out on their own, or have not seen the comments in time to stop things going too far.

This past weekend, I was out of town, busy, and not on my computer. I did not read the comments from this weekend until today. I came back to find that seemingly all hell had broken loose with people commenting negatively about Kate and William, other commentators, their opinions, their writing styles, me, this blog, and my moderating skills.

I have thought for a while that I should make an official comment policy, but have not done so because I didn’t know what I wanted it to say. I read a post on another Kate-focused blog recently about the problems in that blog’s comment section, and though I don’t agree 100% with her rules, I think it is a good idea that she outlined them and is enforcing them. So I am going to take the time to make a comment policy for this blog because it needs one.

I started this blog because my commenting style did not fit in anywhere else. I was too harsh for the pro-Kate blogs, and I was too nice for the anti-Kate blogs. This blog has always tried (though not always successfully) to take a middle ground, “critical but able to see the positive” approach. I used the word “Review” instead of a harsher word specifically because of that – as in, I would review Kate’s goings on, would be critical of her, but could be positive when it was warranted. I had kind of forgotten that after 2+ years of near constant criticism, but that was my original intention when I started my blog.

Yes, this blog is fairly critical of Kate and others, but I don’t want it to devolve into pure hate like I was experiencing on a certain forum I used to post on before I started this blog. That’s not to say this blog won’t be critical. It will be. It will be critical of Kate and William until they step up to the plate as royals. But I do not want this blog to be a negative place. It’s critical, no doubt, but it should still be enjoyable to read and comment on. When it gets too negative, it’s just not enjoyable to read or comment on anymore. I don’t want this to be a negative place. Going off of the idea that this blog was intended to be a middle of the road yet still critical blog, here are my thoughts regarding comments:

Towards me and other commentators:

  • Do not attack, demean, name-call, etc me or other commentators. It is not okay to be rude to other people.
  • Likewise, do not demean, belittle, name-call, etc other people’s opinions – ie. “It is stupid/ridiculous/absurd/dumb to think that [insert commentator’s opinion here]”. Demeaning another person’s opinion is demeaning that person for having that opinion. There is a difference between saying, “It is ridiculous to think that [opinion]”, versus saying, “I disagree with that opinion for X reason”. It is perfectly fine to disagree with an opinion, but attacking someone for having that opinion is not okay.
  • Do not threaten other people. Do not wish death, harm, or illness on other people.

Towards William, Kate, the Middletons, every other royal:

  • Let’s keep the name-calling to a minimum, please. Name-calling is defined as “abusive language or insults”, and calling someone by a name that is not their own with the specific purpose of making fun of them counts as name-calling. I understand why people have their nicknames for them, I don’t necessarily mind that other people have their nicknames for them, but it does seem excessive at times and I think it would be best if we tried to curb the name-calling a bit.
  • Let’s talk about harsher insults than name-calling, terms like “idiot”, “moron”, etc. I actually have a post where I call Kate a moron right in the title (it’s the one where her skirt flew up when they were in the Blue Mountains), so I have used those terms before. And while it may seem apt in the moment, it really is not constructive. So let’s try and keep this to a minimum, too.
  • I, personally, think it’s fine to comment about work ethic. A major part of their role as royals is to preform public duties, so it is perfectly natural to comment on their public duties. And part of their public duties is the frequency of them.
  • I also think it’s fine to comment on their media strategy, their relationship with the public, their relationship with the press, their seeming thoughts on perks versus work, whether or not they want the throne, etc. I also think it’s fine to comment on personal appearance, since so much of royal watching is purely visual since we rarely hear them talk or get quotes from them.
  • I don’t mind commenting on their personal lives (the state of their marriage, their parenting skills, their mental health) and have done so myself. But let’s all (including me) keep in mind we do not know these people personally and do not see them in their private time. We have no idea what they do or what they think. It’s fine to comment on what we see, and to speculate on what we see, but we can never know the truth. We see what we see, see what we want to see, speculate on that, but we do not know the truth. Let’s just remember that.

In general:

  • If you want to call emphasis to a word or phrase, do not use all caps as it comes across as screaming in text. Use * surrounding the word or phrase to call emphasis to it. Or use html code to italicize or bold the word or phrase.
  • Please make comments as readable as possible: proper grammar, spelling, and punctuation. I understand things happen, people rush, autocorrect goes wonky, and English is not everyone’s first language, but please try. No excessive use of capitals or punctuation.
  • Let’s not use foul language. I know I have in the past, but for the most part I try to avoid it. And if I do use it, I censor the word a bit. Not many people use such language, but I want to mention it anyway. Let’s avoid it.

This isn’t about being sensitive versus having a thick skin, this is about being civil and this blog being a safe, comfortable place to comment. So keep things civil, keep things constructive; do not be rude, derogatory, or antagonistic. Discussion and debate are welcome and encouraged, but hostility and extreme negativity are not.

I hope you understand why I’ve written this post, and hope you are comfortable with these comment policies. I think these policies will help ease the tension that has cropped up. If you would like to contact me directly, feel free to email me at katemiddletonreview@gmail.com. Thank you for reading, and happy commenting.

Tomorrow Prince Harry is back in action at Goodwood Aerodrome for a Battle of Britain flypast, and later in the week Kate has her Anna Freud Centre visit, and they all will be out and about for the start of the Rugby World Cup on Friday.

184 thoughts on “Thoughts on a comment policy

  1. Wow. I, too have been away from the blog for a couple of weeks and just read the comments from the previous post.

    I think you are right about a policy, it is just kind of sad that you have to say these things.

    Although from what I saw most regulars were just doing our regular thing – fun, snarky comments. Hopefully the meaner sort (in every sense of the word) will move on. Love this blog, KMR, and the regs. I would hate to lose that.

    1. It’s unfortunate that I have to put it in writing. I kept hoping that people would know not to attack other commentators personally, but it kept happening. There have been enough incidents to warrant a written comment policy. I don’t want to lose what’s good about this blog and the commentators either. I’m hoping this written comment policy only helps keep things good.

      1. If the problems continue you may have to moderate more actively – such as intervening directly when it comes to personal attacks. Luckily, this subject seems less contentious than other subjects but if you look for inspiration for asuccessful inforcement of a comment policy I’d suggest you read up on author John Scalzi and his Mallet of Loving Correction.

          1. Thanks to all of you! Real life does take precendence – and I have begun to find Will and Kate incredibly boring. They are never going to change and it feels increasingly futile to talk about them since the same arguments are getting rehashed.
            However, I’m going to look in once in a while.

    2. Hello Everybody – I am new on the KMR but I already really enjoy this blog and I think it represents very genuine and honest approach towards K&W. I am not particularly into criticism but in that case (I mean K&M lifestyle and attitude) criticism is something inevitable.
      Not so long ago (as many of you) I was very happy for Kate and I supported the idea of her becoming the new princess. Unfortunately after some time I changed my mind. I saw that something is amiss in that “perfect picture”. I was becoming more and more irritated by the countless articles about her “perfection, grace and beauty”. I am not skeptic but I know no one is perfect and that is why I started to seek other information and opinions with the different point of view. KMR is my first and only place which offer something (let me say) closer to reality. I am not always agree with some comments as I am always looking for some prove behind the statement (and sometimes such does not exist ) but I must say that most of the time these opinions make me curious and intrigue even more and I like it. Well – thank you KMR for such a “place” and by the way I didn’t notice much rudeness or hatred, definitely not compering to some virtual space out there and that is why I would love and hope to be the part of you community.

      And last one thing for the future – please forgive me any language, spelling or writing mistakes – English is my second language.

      1. Hi PolishGirl,
        I wish I knew more languages than English. The best I can do is a small smattering of Spanish and Italian (I get as far as the conjugations and then it gets totally confusing). There’s no significant error in what you’ve written. Most of us here think what I believe your view is. You had great hope that Kate would be a hardworking breath of fresh air for the royals but she and William have let you down time and again. If you meant something differently, please let me know. And welcome aboard. 🙂

        1. It is totally what I meant Seth. Frankly, I did not pay attention to K&M until they became engage. With all the media coverage and all that enthusiasm before their wedding I was expecting that future will bring something even more significant. I was happy for Will that Queen let him to marry the “common” girl (though right now she is even less common than some of the royals) and I suspected that is because they are so in love (and maybe they are) and she must be very special. Right now I strongly feel that it was “Much Ado About Nothing” and Kate is no more than plain, ordinary disappointment with no skills than fake smile and cheerfulness ( that is all she can do). And I know it’s stupid that I feel that way but for me it is such a huge wasting of privilege and position like she has as a future Princess of Wales and maybe a Queen. As far as I know Diana was no angel in private but I am pretty sure that Kate will never be able to fill her shoes as a person who genuinely cared for many charities and truly wanted to make difference to the world even with very unhappy marriage as a struggle.

          And thank you so much for the warm welcome 🙂

      2. Hi PolishGirl, welcome!

        We have similar experience in terms of Kate. I, too, liked her at first and wanted to give her the benefit of the doubt. Then things changed as time went on.

        And you’re excused for any mistakes. I know English is not everyone’s native language. Your comment was very well written.

  2. Hey KMR,

    I’m a regular reader but have only commented once before. I have to be honest: I don’t typically think there’s anything out of control about your comment section. There are a couple regular posters who name call and have wacky conspiracy theories, but it’s really not that big of a deal. I usually skim them and move on. That post over the weekend was the first I’ve seen where folks were really clutching their pearls about the sentiments on here (which are really quite mild). I think it’s unfair to feel like you have to change the site you’ve created to accommodate a very small number of people who I suspect are not your target demographic anyway.

    I know you’re not proposing a full-on crack-down, but when other Kate blogs have made it so that only positive comments can get through, that’s when I leave. I want to see real people’s real opinions. Also, a name-calling comment is a million times preferable to a thread-policing comment. If you’re going to censor, those are the ones I think you should not let through 😉

    Thanks for your hard work here. This blog is always an interesting read.

    1. I would never do a full crack down to the point of only letting a certain type of comment through. I hope that’s not what this post is implying. I started this blog because I wasn’t being allowed to post on other sites, so I would never do that here.

      I care less about what people call William and Kate then I do about how people talk to each other. I want this blog to be a place where people can post their honest opinions without getting attacked. But to ensure that, I need to make it clear that attacking other commentators and/or their opinions is not okay. Differing opinions are great, but keep it civil. There is no need to be rude. I just think it’s time that I put that in writing. I’m hoping that by putting it in writing and drawing attention to it in this post, that I won’t have to do a ton of moderation and/or censorship, because people will make sure they aren’t attacking others in their replies.

      Oh, by the way, there have been other incidents that have lead to this, not just the one over the weekend. I really have noticed that when Kate disappears for an extended period, people start attacking each other more. I first noticed it back in May 2014 and it’s only gotten worse. It really is past time for me to have some sort of written comment policy about how we interact with each other.

      1. Might I say that in times of Kate drought covering other royals as you have done in the past might help? I know I’ve missed hearing about Maxima, Leti, Victoria and Mary 🙂

        1. August is a bad time because there is a drought of almost all royals for a few weeks. But they’re back to work now. I’ll have coverage of what the other royals have been up to this week. I was going to have a post this past weekend, but I got so busy that that didn’t end up happening.

      2. I definitely understand your desire to keep commenters from attacking each other. The comment police (not the admin, but just the regular posters that police comments) cause the most strife and do the majority of the attacking on many blogs. IMO, they’re the ones that make blogs less enjoyable to read. I haven’t seen a lot of commenter thread-policing on here before that last post (I haven’t been reading as long as many people have, though) and I’ve always liked that about this blog.

        Unless someone says something threatening or just flat-out super insane, there’s no need for others to police their word choice or accuse them of being vitriolic. You (KMR) should really be the sole participant to make that call since it’s your blog.

  3. I am currently taking the advice of other posters to quit with all the dots. I, however, don’t know how to bold with the code so while I know it’s shouting to use capitals I haven’t the skill to totally avoid it. I love this blog and as Amy said I would hate to lose it and the regulars here don’t generally attack in the manner shown lately. I hope that this won’t get to be a heavily moderated forum such as others out there tend to be. I’ve never thought that I had to tread very carefully here and that’s nice. I guess I may have started something by my mockery of William and Kate in a snarky manner so I will cease and desist. I hope I wasn’t responsible for what I saw today, that was getting way out of control and totally out of character for this forum. I’d seen it once and you stepped in, but that was a rare turn here. Quite frankly, at one point I felt under attack but hopefully expressed myself in a polite manner. It would be very sad to see a few people cause a radical change in this forum, to the point where snarky can be translated into ugly and vicious and mockery consisting of using nicknames long ago earned, being forbidden.

    1. Italics: <em></em>
      Bold: <strong></strong>
      Or just use * (like *this*) which will emphasize a word.

      I don’t want to turn this blog into a heavily moderated anything. I’m hoping by stating some sort of expressed written comment policy that people will monitor themselves a bit so I won’t have to crack down in a way I don’t want to. I like that people can post whatever they want to without fear of being attacked. But lately people have been attacked and I don’t like that, which is why I felt it was necessary to say something. I’ve needed some sort of comment policy for a while.

      In terms of the nicknames: I honestly don’t care that much. I’m more concerned with how people talk to each other than what they refer to William and Kate as. I, personally, don’t use nicknames because of a conversation I had about the use of the name “Waity” several years ago on a different forum that is now defunct. But I don’t much care if others use them. Except when they use the same one 15 times in a comment, then it’s just annoying.

      Even with a comment policy, this blog will not be heavily moderated to the point of only letting a certain type of comment through. As I said, I started this blog because my comments on other blogs were moderated out. I would never turn this blog into that.

      But at the same time, I want this blog to be a place where people can express their opinions without getting attacked, and to ensure that I do need a comment policy regarding how we talk to each other – ie. keep it civil and no personal attacks.

      1. Awesome and thanks for making it clear and I certainly like that we can mock the Cambridges mildly at least. I did feel under attack and I’m pretty sure I was so this is great. I didn’t particularly think that I was out of line and I am not one to return ‘fire’ so to speak. I will use your methods and I must say that I learned something here. This policy as I read it and with your further clarification is nothing more than common courtesy and respect for others.**Thanks KMR**Something else I like is that we have a chance to edit. I need to practice the methods you noted, I tried but well I need to practice:)

  4. This was probably warranted. I chose to follow this blog because I, too, didn’t fit the tone of other blogs that discuss Kate (too negative for Order of Splendor, too even-keel for some of the more critical sites); KMR has long had reasonable, moderate, and well-informed criticism in both the posts and the comments, and I welcome any efforts that will help ensure that this tone remains while allowing freedom of speech. I think the new comment policy does just that.

    As I’ve said before, KMR, thanks for all you do. You work hard (a foreign concept to your blog’s primary subject, of course!) to make this site a fun place to be, and I enjoy the sense of community formed among the regular commenters. I know I speak for all of us when I say that I really appreciate it.

    1. It was definitely warranted. There have been enough incidents that this is overdue. I’m hoping this just keeps things civil between commentators so that we can keep the good conversations and sense of community going in the future.

      Thank you, ABKM, for your kind words.

  5. Thanks KMR for this post. I am also sorry that you had to write this post. Here’s hoping that the dust settles and we can all get back to normal.

    I also enjoy the sense of community amongst the regulars and hope this will continue.

    1. That’s my hope, too. I don’t want to have to be super stern moderator person, so hopefully having this policy expressly written will serve to keep things civil between commentators without me having to step in.

  6. So sorry KMR that you had to address this issue.

    In the past year that I’ve been visiting this site I’ve been impressed by the community here, people who have supported each other through bad times and good and there are some impressive writers here “Snow globe of Williamsville” is still my favorite!!

    I can only speak for myself when I say that I visit this site as a little escapism when the day’s just been a bit much. I don’t know Kate or William or any of the Middletons personally and I frequently go back and forth as to should I be following people I don’t respect? Sometimes when I see a comment about how much the commenter loathes W or K I wonder why are they reading a blog dedicated to them? Why am I following them? I don’t really have any answers but I do so enjoy KMR’s style of writing, very witty and on point, I guess that’s what I stay for. That and the wonderful community of regulars who frequent here, people whom I’ve never met yet feel close to.

    So Thanks to KMR for putting up with us and reminding us that we need to mind our manners:)

    1. Thank you, Lauri. I love the community and the conversations here and want to keep that going. I like when we can support each other and I don’t want things to get too negative. People should be able to post on here without fear of attack. This is just a reminder of that.

    2. I wonder about myself too at times, but this is escapism and a chance to vent. I really was/am angry at that stunt William pulled with the tube strike and this was in the news so it was fair game and so was he. I’m still angry but have said enough. We don’t **know** these people but they are public figures and we know from the news at least what they are up to or not. For me, it’s fun. I learn a lot and yes it’s escapism but also a way of expressing what we think of people’s antics. If the Middletons would go away or William and Kate would miraculously change (not like People reports on her blech) then it wouldn’t be so amusing, mind boggling, and downright healthy to have a place to bluster and vent. That sentence makes no sense but it’s the only way I know to put it. In a very real way if we are force fed the sugar and praise and subjected to the endless pictures we need a way to get our own feelings out there and send a message that we’re not all ‘buying it’ 🙂 That needs to happen I think. And I need to let off steam.

  7. I feel like the personal attacks toward bloggers on this site and the moderator over the weekend is to cause a form of sensorship of the media. I don’t agree with personal attacks against other bloggers or the extreme criticism of someone’s writing style. I don’t think you should have to have a comments policy. I think you do an outstanding job of maintaining an interesting blog about a topic that many are interested in following and discussing. I am personally not impressed at all with Kate and Willaim. However, I don’t post often because I don’t like to say mean things about other people. I often think of how I would feel if my boss read my posts. That allows me to have the ability to sensor myself. I once went to a Taylor Swift concert. She has the song about “why you have to be so mean?” And talks about cyber bullying and saying mean and hurtful things about people on the internet. We have all heard that Kate is so arrogant that she doesn’t care what we say, but I don’t feel like a nice person when I personally attack others in a mean way. So I keep my comments more based on fact and behavior and personal observations vs on name calling or criticizing Kate’s looks or style etc.

    Ultimately, I love this blog and I appreciate that so many other people are willing to say the things that I’m not able to.

    1. Are you a Taylor Swift fan? Me too! I’ve never been to one of her concerts but I do have all her albums.

      I’ve never really wanted to have a comment policy because I always thought people should be able to work things out and agree to disagree before they got too heated, but there have been enough incidents that I think it’s necessary. In the hope that we can keep things civil at least between commentators, so that everyone can say what they really feel without being attacked. I love reading everyone’s opinions.

      1. If you are a Taylor Swift fan then you must try and get to a concert. I have a friend with a Taylor obsessed daughter, she’s taken her daughter to a couple of concerts and said that the show and the staging/ costumes etc are amazing, well worth the expensive tickets. It has made a fan of my friend too 🙂

    2. Hi Switch,
      I don’t feel there is a comparison – we have a choice to follow/ support Swift music – or not to … The Royals are there – no choice of taxpayers support in hundreds of millions, while the needy and less fortunate – social programs are short/over-run.

      A commoner marry in, should be mature, hardworking at giving back – more than the RF – HM / POW / P Anne/Wessex/York (the other pension age hardworking Royals i.e. Kents..) -km the marry in commoner should be a great advocate, dedicated to the people … instead, we are stuck with a entitled – pampered/lazy (spending millions a year).

      Km may not care what the people say… and it shows with the lack of duties, serving/giving back… but the Firm/HM -POW care about the BRF survival/history, duties and tradition- the people.

  8. For some reason I didn’t get notification of the last post. My mail program has been doing odd things lately, or maybe my computer just decided I didn’t need to see the comments…lol

    Anyway, things did get a little heated but for some reason this couple brings that out in people. That can be good and bad. I don’t have a problem with you establishing some firmer guidelines on the comments. Sometimes we just need to take a step back and I know there are times when I just want to *@!%##! and have to bite my virtual lip. And lately it’s been really hard to do that and it’s probably because millions of people are out there working their backsides off to live and try to make this world a better place and she’s in a position to actually maybe affect something in a positive way and all it seems she does is sit on her now royal rear.

    Just my two cents. Let’s get out there and play fair!

    1. Kate especially, but William too, really bring out the emotion in people. It’s so odd, but there really is a correlation between when Kate disappears and the level of animosity between commentators. There is always a spike in animosity when she has been absent for a significant amount of time.

      1. Interesting that you say animosity between commentators seems to grow when Kate is out of sight for too long.

        Want to thank you for this fair and supportive blog. I, too, am sorry that things got out of hand and it is very professional of you to want to make sure that does not continue.

        I hope there will remain a nice cyber friendship among people who have come to know one another and respect one another’s different points of view on your site. Maybe, friendship is the wrong word, but I hope you all know what I mean.

        In no way is this your fault, KMR. You have always been fair and helpful to everyone who posts here — especially if you feel that anything has gotten out of hand. You were away this weekend, so wouldn’t you know that was the time when things got dicey? Your ideas for regulating things are fair and we should all respect them.

        We don’t want to lose this blog. Really, we don’t. You work so very hard and your efforts are appreciated very much.

        1. I agree with your thoughts 100% Jenny. 🙂 You were just able to express what I’ve been thinking but could never write, as you write far more eloquently than I. 🙂

          1. No, Seth. You write beautifully, yourself. Thanks for your kind words. And, again, I am sorry for the losses you have endured.
            May happier days be with you.

      2. Interesting observation about the correlation between animosity level and extended Kate absence. I doubt that is because folks here have nothing better to do than quibble with each other when Kate is absent. Rather, it may that an extended absence increases the perception that she is “re-writing the rules” (by not performing as expected in her role as Duchess) – which causes observers to feel more strongly about either (1) criticizing or (2) defending her. Thoughts?

        1. I’ve been tracking this phenomenon for over a year and my two thoughts are:

          1) People have animosity toward at Kate, and when they cannot direct their animosity toward Kate because of her absence, they direct it toward the only other outlet they have which is each other.

          OR

          2) When Kate is absent for an extended period, the animosity grows, and people get more hostile with each other.

          Either way, when Kate reappears, people have a target to direct their animosity toward and are less likely to direct their anger toward other posters.

  9. KMR blogs are escapism as well informative from a very busy life – work/travel, volunteer, Associations – will abide by rules – thanks.

    Taxpayers – hardworking, professional, the needy, charities volunteers are very offended and insulted by these two pampered, selfish, secret permanent vacation lifestyle – of two undeserving- DONOTHING cambridge.

  10. I’ve been lurking for the past couple of weeks but haven’t had the time to comment. Too much going on in real life. I really enjoy the atmosphere of this blog. It’s one of the few that I actually comment on and not just lurk. I think your comment policy is fair and reasonable – basically act civilly towards each other. Thanks for all your hard work and I look forward to more great posts!

  11. I’m sorry you had to write this post. That said your rules are more than fair. I love this blog and check it several times a day just to read the comments. Keep up the great work and hopefully we all will behave

    1. Sorry, I’m a threadjack enabler but please allow me to try out this British phrase I learned from the TV show The Inbetweeners: he can get it.

      1. Are you loving the beard or not?? I think it’s quite handsome on him, makes him look a little more rugged, more rough. Oh my, I think someone turned up the heat in my office 🙂

        1. He gets more handsome as he ages. I love the ginger beard and scruff. He looks tough as nails, but I bet he’s a lamb. I literally stared at the pics.

          Did you know that he was supposed to fly in the float but gave up his seat to a veteran? He’s hot and chivalrous.

          1. Rhiannon!!!!! Your hubby is looking better and better! Harry is really growing into his looks and thanks for telling us about Harry giving a veteran his seat. Now that’s a thoughtful man as the small things do count. 🙂

    2. Oh, Lauri, thanks. He is so gorgeous! Love him!
      Wasn’t the photo of Harry with the lion amazing? How about Harry with the children in Africa?
      He is one hot future King! Fingers crossed!

          1. Rhiannon, I am just wondering how much you drooled over those pics? And just give me a sign and I will be over to help you and Lauri C with the plans.

            Your Hubby is looking even more gorgeous lately

          2. I drooled, but I also started to think “Hmm, a forest green or gray turtleneck” would look so good on him. Or, which uniform he will wear at the wedding. Or, I could imagine us sitting in a field on a picnic or playing football…I’m telling you, I’m perfect for him.

  12. KMR,

    Totally understand the stance you are taking. If a blog loses it’s credibility then why even put the time and work into the blog. I think certain people need to understand that this blog is essentially your baby and watching your baby dilapidate and disinigrate must be hard for you to watch. I agree most with the proper grammer portion of the policy haha…come on people, we have spell check now!

  13. KMR,

    I appreciate such a well balanced policy. It also reflects your thoughtful and well-crafted approach to the subject matter of this blog and the contributions of most of the commenters in the past. It’s a shame you had to finally spell it out, but I guess it had to happen some time as you get more popular.

    Thank you for your thoughts and hard work. Visiting this blog has always been a pleasure and a safe haven for those of us who want to speak our minds and not be reduced to being called ‘haters’.

    1. Honest question; truly, and not just to you, Maven. Do you think the fans should be reduced to being called “sugars”? Do we want to reduce people to amorphous blobs? That’s what I was trying to get at last post, and I don’t know if I said it well or not. And in this case I’m not talking about William and Kate, but rather the people who post about them, because I think that kind of thinking on a larger scale can be dangerous and make it very easy to pit people against each other.

      Don’t get me wrong; there are people who make my eyes roll out of my sockets — on both sides. But most of us aren’t that extreme, and I guess I’m uncomfortable herding people there.

      1. A good question, bluhare.

        I thought you were commenting on the nicknames for the Cambridges only rather than the broader community.

        I think there is a difference between nicknames and name-calling. What I find irksome is when, in the midst of a conversation/debate, someone pulls out the ‘haters’ card, in essence, derailing debate. If someone pulled out the ‘sugars’ card (I’ve never personally seen that happen) in the midst of conversation, it’s the same thing- derailing. Anyone who needs to name-call in the midst of debate is someone who can find no sound basis for their argument, so attempts to dismiss, invalidate and abort the entire argument by using an ad hominem attack.

        I also think that there are sides and groups and that’s okay, because, such is life. If you want to diss the other side, do it on your own turf rather than crossing over to give the other side grief by name-calling. I have no problem with one side calling the other ‘haters’ or ‘sugars’- in essence, nicknames; just keep it within your own little community. Once you cross over, you’d better have a sound basis for your views. IMO. Without the name-calling.

        BTW, on the topic of ‘sugars’, for the longest time I had no idea what the heck that meant and have never personally used the term because I just don’t care enough to. 🙂 It’s only when people bring name- calling into real, live, human space that I have a problem with it.

        I hope that answers your question. And thanks for asking it!

      2. You have mentioned your reasons for your dislike of the term “sugars” in the past, and I fully agree with you. I have not used that term since the last time you brought up the subject.

        The term “sugars” is the exact same as “haters”, just for a different group of people.

        What bothers me is when one makes a negative comment, and people throw the label “hater” at one when that negative comment may not fully express their views on the subject. Likewise, people throw the label “sugar” at one when one says something positive, when that comment may not fully express one’s views. Those terms are very limiting when people can have nuanced opinions on these subjects.

      3. Thanks to both of you for two very thoughtful answers. I don’t like name-calling of any kind, including to WC, and I really don’t have an issue with it here. I’m just not a fan of removing people’s humanity, because we all have it.

        Thanks again; I think I agree with both of you!

  14. Love your blog! I don’t spend much time on blogs, but yours is one I routinely read (along with Celebitchy and Royal Dish). Keep up the good work! I think your readers can self moderate. (we all have our moments, myself included.)

  15. I think your policy is fair. I love this blog, but I don’t comment much.

    I’m not sure if anyone has mentioned it, but the Daily Mail has pictures of Kate’s new hair cut. They were published a few days ago, so I’m probably late to the party. 🙂

  16. I think you have a more realistic approach to the British royal family which is so appreciated. I echo many others that you had to remind us to have mutual respect and common courtesy. Thank you for providing this unique type of blog where we can learn about all royal families and be able to express thoughtful opinions.

  17. A shame that this needed to be addressed, KMR. You have worked so very hard to create and maintain a wonderful blog. I agree that this is a place to go to escape the stress of everyday life and vent (nicely) on what one thinks of the Kate and William situation and other issues pertaining to Royals. Interesting that you say things get nastier when Kate is not around. Wonder what that is all about.

    At any rate, I felt that the calling out of you for your blog was truly not called for, but then was explained in a more balanced way. I always appreciate your support and your hard work, KMR.

    I think it is often easy to write something in one way and have it taken in another, but the recent nasty comments were not done in that way. Or, so I thought.

    At any rate, I hope this blog continues and grows. As others have mentioned, people here are very often so supportive of one another. That is nice in a world where things can become way out of line often.

  18. I appreciate you your doing this. I do feel like this is a great community. We respect each other and support each other. I can understand the need for respect. I left Tumblr over this same thing. I don’t want to lose this blog as it’s my escape too.

    You’re a gem, KMR. I appreciate the fact that, when asked, you started to cover the other families. You’re open and receptive to everyone’s feedback.

    Plus you tolerate my grand scheme of marrying Harry.

    1. Tumblr scares me. I’ve heard so many stories about people getting so out of hand.

      Lol, I’m totally on board with your marrying Harry plan.

  19. Hi KMR,
    Yeah unfortunately it did become quite a bit crazy over the weekend and I’m absolutely sure I didn’t help too much because I know I have an “acid tongue” writing style. Also my 91-year-old grandfather died nine days ago and on Saturday I was involuntarily released from a volunteer position I’ve held for 8 years. Some of the responses I gave to people were an immature and irrational way to release my frustration and anger from other parts of my life onto easy targets here, some of whom I honestly never heard of before and at least one of whom apparently has been commenting for years alongside me and I replied with a full-on broadside. I apologize to you and to the others for allowing my anger (and grief) to get the better of me. I will do my best to adhere to this new comment policy which seems sensible (I’m sure Her Majesty the Queen would approve!)

    1. I am so sorry for the loss of your grandfather. Ninety one years is an impressive and long life. I sending light and comfort. Same with your volunteer position.

    2. Seth, I will admit, I thought you were off the rails in the last post; really not “yourself”. You’ve always been brash and opinionated, but also fair and interesting! Knowing what I know now, let bygones be bygones. No one is perfect, and I have nothing but respect and admiration for your comment above. And this is what I love about the KMR community, and that includes the “regulars” who don’t often/ ever post, but always enjoy those who do.

      I also apologize if anyone felt attacked personally by anything I said…not a good feeling even if don’t know the person and can’t see their face

      1. “Brash and opinionated.” I’ve never been called “brash” before. I think of 007 or the like when I think of “brash.” As for “opinionated…” No one’s EVER called me THAT one before. Or at least no one who’s never met me or read something I written. 🙂

        1. I meant it in the nicest way possible, Seth. I meant you don’t tippy toe around when you have something to say…we always know what side of the fence you’re on. And totally go with the 007, I’m picturing Daniel Craig…

          1. Never got around to adding my two cents (never 2Pence, that’s for someone else;) ) .Daniel Craig’s my favorite Bond too. I think of someone who looks intellectual but who can lay a smack down second to none when it’s needed.

        2. When I think of 007, I think of suave. I think of someone who can sweet talk someone, drink a martini, and then kicking their butt.

          1. In terms of looks Ray, I always thought that Peirce Brosnan was the best looking Bond. And on that note, I am off to drink a martini…..shaken of course 🙂

          2. Whenever I think of Brosnon I think of the choking on shrimp scene from Mrs. Doubtfire. I just can’t take him seriously.

    3. Seth, I am sorry to read about your loss. Times like this are never easy. It takes a person of real character to admit they are struggling with grief and they may have used a few words out of line.

      1. I haven’t commented in a long time, and will not after this comment because I was the one who caused the big meltdown back in March of this year. I, like Seth, was going through a very bad time-my oldest daughter had gotten pregnant and was going to give the baby up for adoption. I was angry that everything had worked out for Carole who arguably primed Kate for Will versus my raising my daughter to be an intelligent, independent young woman. Sometimes life doesn’t work out right, and it’s so hard to swallow. I was angry and hurting, sick with bronchitis, and I took it out on others here. I enjoyed this blog because of the freedom to speak our minds. I don’t post anymore because I upset so many people, and I felt very bad about that. I occasionally read the blog and wish you all well. BTW, I’d never posted or really read many blogs before, and had no idea that picking “Sugar” was a word for W&K lovers. I picked it because I’m definitely sugar and spice. Best wishes to you KMR and to everyone

        1. I know you’re not going to post here anymore, but I’m going to reply anyway.

          That’s interesting that you say you don’t comment anymore because you feel badly for upsetting people. I feel badly for seemingly driving you away. I did not handle that situation well and when you stopped commenting I felt like it was my fault for making you feel so negatively toward me and the blog.

          I’m sorry to hear about your situation from back in March. I had no idea. I hope everything worked out with your daughter. It really sucks to see other people getting handed everything without working for anything when we work so hard for something and don’t get it. I understand now why you would have been so sensitive to someone even roundaboutly praising Carole.

          Again, I hope everything worked out and I’m sorry you feel you can’t comment here anymore.

          1. Dear KMR, I’m breaking what I said because this in no way is your fault. You host a fun blog, and I jumped in, unprovoked and snarled at people for their opinion. I didn’t realize just how unhappy I was until I was in the thick of things. I felt bad about it, but the damage was done, and I could tell when I posted the few times afterward, many were giving me space because I had hurt the “cyber trust” that comes from basically anonymous posting. You host a great site with lots of intelligent points that could help W&K if they really read the comments and didn’t dismiss negativity as snark. I don’t want to be a distraction on your page, and I don’t want to make others uncomfortable, because they wouldn’t be sure if I might jump on them if I don’t agree with something. I only broke my ghosting because Seth’s apology touched my heart, and I realized I had never really full out apologized myself for causing the mess earlier this year. The irony is I’ve worked countless mediation sessions, and I’m known for being the peacemaker. LOL to that. As far as my daughter, she’s a wonderful human being who went through relationship abuse with her fiance, we got her out, she made other poor choices from a broken place, and here we are. The baby is doing well with her adopted family. I am trying to live each day as best as I can. When I look at my daughter who can talk intelligently and passionately about a number of charitable issues that we are involved in, attractive, and strong…I didn’t even realize that I envied Carole. I don’t agree with her methods, but I wish like hell I’d done things differently. But that’s for the parent blogs. Here, things will truck along smashingly, and I sincerely wish the best for all of you. Again KMR, thank you for having such an open blog. I had fun while I was here. Sincerely, Sugar

          2. Thank you for your response, Sunny (I’ll call you that now since you changed your handle). I felt truly terrible for how I handled things in March and I never really got to make amends. I’m glad we’ve been able to talk this out now. Please feel free to comment any time.

            I’m glad everything worked out well with the adoption. Hopefully your daughter can move forward with her life now that she’s free from the relationship abuse and has dealt with the pregnancy and adoption. Hug to you, Sunny, and your daughter; and the little baby who I hope grows up well with her adopted family.

        2. Hi Sugar,

          I’ve been wondering where you’ve been, I am sorry to hear about the suffering you and your family have endured. Please know that joy can come out of situations like one you and your family are going through, it just takes time and faith.

          1. Thanks Lauri. I will enjoy ghosting in here to chuckle over the various conversations and send you all my best. I really enjoyed all the conversations.

    4. Hi Seth, Sorry to hear about your grandfather.
      Sorry to also hear about the loss of your voluntary job, I lost my volunteer role last year due to a verbal attack by another volunteer. It was extremely upsetting what she did and what she said. It still hurts nearly a year later but I would rather walk than get involved with any further volunteer committee politics. (End result was that they lost someone who volunteered for over 600 hours per year)

      1. I’m sorry about the loss of your volunteer position. You put everything you have into making a place better, because you care, not because of compensation. As I’m sure you’ll understand, I can’t talk publicly about what happened. But I too volunteered a substantial portion of time to the organization and other volunteers will now have to make up the gaps. I feel bad about it. But unfortunately these things happen. Enjoy your walking. 🙂

      2. Cathy I am sorry for the loss of your volunteer position last year, too.
        All the positive efforts you made throughout your long and hard work will continue to do well. I can see that you could still be hurt by the insensitive words of someone else.

        It’s a sorry thing when politics gets in the way of helping others. I’m sure that there will be another place for you should you want to volunteer elsewhere. It seems to be that someone who spent so much time helping others – like you- has made a difference in many, many lives. That counts for so much. Good for you.

        BTW, I came across your kind post on another thread the other day and I had not seen it before, so I was not ignoring the question you posed to me. Thanks for asking how I am doing. I’m fine. Just feeling big – although, people swear I am not.
        Feeling tired, too. Eager for the baby to arrive. Can’t sleep too well as it is. So, the sleepless nights during the baby’s first few months won’t be a change. What will change is having such a special, new life to love.

        Take care of yourself.

        1. Hi Jenny. Thanks for your kind words. It still hurts but what made it worse that I received very little support from others that I volunteered with, though one lady said to me that she was very sorry about what happened but everyone is keeping their heads down and keeping quiet as they don’t want to be the next person who is attacked. Yikes!
          Moving on to much better things!
          Thanks for the update on your pregnancy, I’m getting excited for you here! I did see your other post and saw that baby is due around the end of November. Does this mean you are NOT cooking a turkey this year? Or going shopping on Black Friday? That certainly would be one way of making sure baby comes at Thanksgiving? (You may have guessed that I’m assuming you are in the USA?). Enjoy the next couple of months as it’s going to get very very busy!
          And thanks again for the answer 🙂

          1. Hi, Cathy:

            Again, so nice of you to post and send me good wishes.
            What a shame that nastiness infiltrated your loyal volunteer activities. Also a shame that others did not come to your defense. I am sure that if/when you are ready, another opportunity will come your way. Any organization would be lucky to have you.

            Yes, I am in the U.S. and no, I don’t think I will cook a turkey or shop this year. I just cannot imagine how I will even eat a huge Thanksgiving meal this year. Do you have children? Pregnancy is such a wonderful, yet sometimes annoying condition. I love when the baby moves. So exciting. Just love imagining what she/he will look like, be like and become. I don’t like the fact that I feel like I waddle now, instead of walk. Everyone tells me I don’t look big, but boy, do I feel huge! It’s hard to sleep. Hard to concentrate at times. I find myself becoming very forgetful and thankfully, my mood swings and crying jags are a thing of the past. I know my husband is counting down the minutes, too,

            I am glad that you said you are moving on to better things. I hope you find the right opportunities.

            Thanks for your good wishes.

    5. Sorry to hear about your grandfather and the volunteer position. I hope you’re feeling better, it’s always good to see your posts!

      1. Thank you so much. I’m not sure if you’ve posted here before. If you have, welcome back. If you haven’t, welcome aboard. Either way, a warm welcome. 🙂

    6. On further reflection, let me clarify something. First thank you all for your kind thoughts and sympathy after my grandfather’s death. However, even though I am going through a difficult time, it was and is inappropriate and rude of me to take it out on people on this blog. Even though some of them were in my view being irrational and rude themselves, I should never have been rude and irrational myself. Simply because I have an excuse doesn’t mean I’m excused from exercising good judgment and proper decorum. As one of my philosophy professors said in college, we should be trying to generate light, not heat, on the issues we discuss. Once again I apologize to you all for allowing external issues (Grandpa, volunteer dismissal) to drive my judgment of internal issues (people’s opposing, strong views on the royals). Now that that’s over with, on with the blog! 🙂

      1. Dear Seth, I wanted to break what I said above briefly, to tell you how sorry I am about your grandfather’s passing. I hope you have the support of your family and friends around you, and am glad that you have so many cyber-hugs here. I’ve lost all of my grandparents, and while I find ways to keep them in my daily life, I miss them very much. Sending you all my best. Sugar

    7. Oh, Seth. I am sorry for the loss of your beloved grandfather. Sorry to learn about the loss of the volunteer job that you held for eight years. You have had a tough time and I believe others will join me in sending good thoughts and wishes your way.

      Life is very fragile and we all need the support of good folk. Please know you are thought of with special feelings here.

      Take care and know that love is never ending. The love that you have experienced will go on and on. The good work you did as a volunteer will, too. And, when you are ready, I am sure you will find another way to help others.

      1. Thank you so much Jenny for your *extremely* kind words. I greatly appreciate the support of people who are only connected to one another by a computer and a blog. Take extra special care as your pregnancy comes toward a close and a entirely new life begins! I’ll keep you and your little one in my thoughts for a safe delivery. Absolute best to you and yours. 🙂

  20. Sometimes I have to wonder if this blog (or at least what it has become) serves a worthy purpose. If we listed out what our values and goals are in life, does this blog help us achieve them? It seems that at the foundation of KMR is a desire for the “truth” about Kate to be known. People come here because they are unhappy that Kate is receiving undue praise. But even if all this speculation is true–if Kate is not gracious, kind, and hardworking like she is repeatedly reported to be, then what? What difference does it make to anyone’s life to have this knowledge? If the public were to see her as lazy or without the best intentions, what good comes of it? Unless one strongly feels that England would be better off without royalty and views attacking Kate (or revealing the “true” her) as a means of dismantling the crown, then I honestly cannot come up with any ideas as to how the lives of the individuals reading this blog or the wider public at large are made better by this blog. So, why do you come to KMR? Why do you need a place to discuss your critique of Kate? I’m honestly curious.

    1. Escapism.

      I will not speak for anyone else, but for me I pay attention to the royals for the same reason I watch TV and movies, read books, and play video games. To escape my normal life for a bit. But I don’t just follow what everyone else says about the people and things I follow, movies I watch, books I read, the games I play. I form my own opinion of those things. For books, TV, movies, and games I have people in my life with which to discuss my opinions. But for royals I do not. This blog allows me to find like-minded people with which to share my opinions of the royals.

      If we listed out what our values and goals are in life, nothing recreational helps us to achieve them. But people still watch TV and movies, read books, play video games, horse back ride, bowl, swim, play sports, watch sports, and a whole host of other things. And then some people like royal watching.

      I get enjoyment form discussing my opinions of the royals with others through this blog. That’s why it exists. That’s why I keep doing it.

      PS. You could ask your same questions of a non-critical Kate-focused blog. Why are you specifically asking this of a critical blog?

      PPS. Please be careful. Your comment isn’t necessarily rude, but it could come across as a bit judgemental of other commentators. I hope you are genuinely curious about other people’s thought processes and not being underhandedly rude. If royal watching isn’t your thing, that’s fine, but other people do enjoy it and there is nothing wrong with that.

      1. I specifically asked about a critical blog, because the way I see it, the escapism on the other blogs isn’t hurting anyone. I definitely think we all need sources for enjoyment and escapism in our lives, because although they may not help us reach our goals, they provide us with the balance and energy to do so. Your response helped me realize that my comment/questions were really pointing towards a critique at a larger aspect of modern culture in general and probably not appropriate or helpful on this specific venue. Please feel free to delete my original comment. I didn’t want to offend, but it looks like it’s coming across as offensive. I actually first looked to see if there was an email address for KMR that I could specifically send my questions to, but when I didn’t see one (I may have just missed it), I posted here. Thanks for giving me a thoughtful response; I think it speaks a lot to your integrity. And again, feel free to delete my original comment if you think it’s in the best interests of the blog community here.

        1. I did put my email at the end of this post. It’s also somewhere on the About page. It’s KateMiddletonReview@gmail.com.

          Thank you for replying. I’m glad it’s genuine curiosity and not just a means to put others down.

          In terms of your question I’m going to point out another example other than Kate: Kim Kardashian. She gets the same positive/negative thing Kate does. There are loads of people who love Kim, and then loads of people who loath her, and then people in the middle who don’t understand why people love her but don’t necessarily loath her either. One could say the people who don’t like Kim should just stop paying attention, but for some reason they still do. They love commenting on her even if it’s just to say something negative. They get enjoyment from commenting negatively about her.

          I don’t really have a conclusion for you other than to say that escapism through being critical or commenting negatively about someone isn’t specific to Kate Middleton. Whether that as a form of escapism is good or bad is up to the individual to decide.

          1. That’s definitely fair–that it’s up to the individual. And I guess people who pursue celebrity status (or date/marry into it) have to know that it’s going to come with followers who like and dislike, love and hate. Thanks again for the “chat.”

          2. Even as a non-celebrity who just writes a blog I know know not everyone is going to agree with me, so celebrities and royals must know not everyone will like them.

            Thank you for being polite about your questioning; it was a nice little discussion.

    2. Sarah,
      I follow the royals b/c it’s what I personally consider my “trashy” interest. Some people read clichéd, formulaic romance novels (which is completely fine to me), some people watch reality TV. I read about the royals, especially the British royals. To me it is “useless” information, in so far as, knowing what I know about them doesn’t really change anything. What does it matter to the fate of the world that the Queen prefers a special blend of Twinings? Or that the Prince of Wales has a device made of silver to get the last bit of toothpaste out of the tube but that supposedly he doesn’t actually do it himself? I think people would agree (though they don’t have to), that it doesn’t particularly add anything very important. But it to me, it’s a way to relax from studying the “serious” subjects of 20th century American history or British constitutional history (which of course the Queen as head of state is deeply connected with). For me, pure relaxation and escapism. It’s fascinating but I don’t need to think too much about it. That’s my answer. 🙂

          1. That’s the thing for me. I have a friend who knows that I follow the royals but he doesn’t himself so it’s not like I can share my opinions with him. And no one else knows. So for me, the blog is a way to find other people I can share my opinions with. That’s what it is really, a community to share opinions you wouldn’t normally share with other people in your life.

    3. I have come in on the middle of this thread, so I may be asking something that was already answered. If so, sorry.

      You ask why people need a place to discuss or critique Kate. I can say why I come here, but if I may also ask, why do you, Sarah?

      I come for an escape from the daily grind, quite frankly. I love the comments for the most part and am intrigued by the differing opinions, but mostly enjoy knowing that so many may feel the way I do.

      I guess it bothers me — is that a good word — that Kate gets so much positive press when she does so little of import. She is in a position in life where she could influence and help so many and she doesn’t seem to want to do that, or need to do it.

      When women are given a role or position in life in which they can make a difference, I think they should. So, it astounds me that she does not do that. If she did, I think she would inspire others to do that too.

      It’s also a way to keep up with the Royals — this site. And, let’s face it, don’t most people have an interest in the rich and famous? Or, those born into a niche that most of us will never get to. I am pretty much content with my humble life and am happy doing what I do and with my family and friends. Still, I love women’s magazines. Love romance stories and love, love, love this site. It’s real. It’s honest and it bolsters my opinions. KMR is right. I am sure you did not mean this as a rude question, but it can appear that way if people read it in a way you may not have intended.

      Ok, now I want to say that KMR answered this quite nicely. Interested in knowing others’ feelings, but I guess I should just scroll up and down and see.

    4. Hi Sarah, I may add to my reply already given:
      To me another reason I follow the royals is the rich and proud tradition of the monarchy in the United Kingdom (even though I am an American). I would ask very respectfully and politely as well, that we all please remember that William and Catherine are not simply celebrities; they are the 2nd-in-line and consort of the 2nd-in-line to the throne of the United Kingdom and fifteen other Commonwealth nations. They will almost certainly be King and Queen.
      Catherine will also be mother of the King one day (but she will in all likelihood be called the Queen Mother. She can not be called King Mother, which Diana made as a joke after her divorce and which someone in the press took too literally. To be the mother of the King means she would have to have been either the sister, daughter, daughter-in-law or sister-in-law of the deceased monarch and would probably be a royal Duchess, or she would have to have been Queen–either consort or regnant will do–but there is not and never can be a title “King Mother”, like “Queen Mother,” just as there can’t be a title “King Father.” B/c of the long history of the Queen Mother, people assumed any mother of a Queen can be a Queen Mother. No. The Duchess of Kent was the mother of the Queen (Victoria) but could never have been the Queen Mother because she was never the Queen. Her late Majesty actually insisted on the full title being used: Queen Elizabeth the Queen Mother, so she could be a Queen twice over and so “the” had to be used, just as in her previous title of The Queen. Sorry, rant over. Back to regular programming.*)

      There are great constitutional and historical implications of William and Catherine becoming the monarch and consort. No disrespect to her but Kim Kardashian is simply a celebrity. William would formally (on advice of the Prime Minister or Defence Secretary of the day) declare war on another nation. Catherine will likely exercise the duties of the Sovereign (with other senior members of the Royal Family) as a Counsellor of State if William is overseas and she doesn’t accompany him, or if he’s incapacitated. In the event Prince George or Princess Charlotte took the throne before their 18th birthday, she would possibly reign as Regent unless Parliament vested it in Prince Harry or another member farther down the line of succession.
      So to me they are not simply celebrities. They represent the latest link in a line that goes back centuries, to Henry VIII, Elizabeth I, Richard II, etc.

  21. I am like other’s here, I love this blog! I came here awhile back after becoming frustrated with the overly adoring Kate sites. I like Kate, but I appreciate a realistic view of her. I also don’t like the hateful sites either, which is why this site is the perfect middle of the road. I also enjoy the comments section and have always loved how civil everyone is to each other. But I don’t think it is bad, KMR, to give guidelines either.

    My only problem with comments are the ones like above by “Sarah”. There was also a comment last post by a ‘new’ commenter. As well as several over the past year or so. They are always by new posters (which don’t get me wrong, I love new posters, the ones who love this site). But these new people make it clear they do not intend on staying around on this site. Their whole comment is to either put down the site, KMR as a person, or those who comment on this site. If a new commenter really intends on staying they don’t start off by attacking or insulting. They are not bringing anything to the discussion other than to let us know how wrong we as a group are. Those are the comments I am surprised get let through since their only purpose are to insult this site and those on it. I often times wonder if it is the same group of people, probably from a fanatical Kate site, the come over and just keeps changing their names. They are just trying to cause a ruckus. I actually wish those comments would be moderated so that the people just wanting to put this site down would not be able to do so and therefore will give up their quest. Just my two cents.

    1. I went and read comments on the site that bluhare also posts on. It’s so weird, most of those posters are “anonymous” in some form or other. You would never know which anon was which, from day to day. Maybe it doesn’t matter, but it feels a little more personal to talk/share/debate with people who have individual “tags”

      1. There have been many explanations but it boils down to two. (a) people were attacked by other posters and feel more comfortable posting anonymously. (b) people hide behind it to play games and attack people. It’s ridiculous. And all of this over two people who would cross the street rather than talk to any of us.

      2. I prefer ‘tags’ as well, that way you feel like you get to know people on here :). When there are a bunch of ‘anons’ like on the site you mentioned, it always starts to feel like it is the same couple of people commenting. I know it is not, but with that many ‘anons’ it is hard to tell. It always makes me laugh when I see a comment by one anon and then there are like 4 anon comments under it all agreeing with the original anon.

    2. Well those people have all had different IP addresses and emails. So there’s that. The one thing that set Sarah apart was the fact that she subscribed to be notified of replies where none of the others did. That said to me she was genuine in wanting a reply.

      1. It’s really hard to pick up the tone of what people are saying sometimes, but you handled it well, and she was appreciative in her response. I thought that was progressive, respectful dialogue

        1. Hey Lauri from Ca! On the last post you mentioned that you have read several books about William & Kate’s courtship. I’m in a phase where I’m reading a lot about the royals, so I’d appreciate any recommendations of books! So far I have only read one book about Kate. I’ve been reading mostly about Diana and her marriage to Prince Charles.

          1. the only one I can think of off the top of my head is Kate: The Future Queen by Katie Nicholl. Sorry, but I’m not at home right at the moment and home is where all my books are 🙂

          2. Hi Boat, I read William & Catherine: their story by Andrew Morton (who wrote Diana’s bio). I read it awhile ago but I recall it being one of the more honest stories out there. Of course it praises Will and Kate, but I recall it also giving a more honest look at their courtship and the amount of waiting around Kate did. So, I would recommend that one. It also has a bunch of photos.

          3. Hi Overit and Lauri! Thanks for the recommendations. I have read Katie Nicholl’s book (but I read it when it first came out, so I might reread it). However, I haven’t read the one by Andrew Morton about Will & Kate. I did read his biography of Diana. I will look into picking that one up! Thank you!

    3. Hi Overit, while I enjoy hearing some new voices around here I have noticed that most of the flare ups occur when someone who has never posted here before comes onboard on winds everyone up. For instance, in this last flare up a commenter commented once, wound everyone up and wasn’t heard from again. I imagine that they’re sitting somewhere enjoying all the angst and hurt that followed their comments. As I recall this happened earlier in the year however the troll was spotted and ignored, unfortunately this time it wasn’t spotted early enough.

      1. That’s exactly what I noticed as well. There were two or three posters (or perhaps just one) who came on, stirred up a hornet’s nest and ran like the dickens in the other direction.
        And just so you all know: I post under my real name here. This is the only site on the Internet where I do.

  22. A site like this will draw some personalities that like to make pointed and mean spirited comments. When the DOC isn’t in view as a target, it looks like the targets become other commenters. Not all commenters are like this, of course.

    1. Exactly. And to add, unfortunately we get frustrated b/c there’s so much potential to the Duke and Duchess, but they seem to not care at all about others’ perceptions of them. When we go days or weeks even without anything happening, just regurgitation of articles by the papers for click bait, we feel we don’t have other options but to start discussing our feelings with others and it unfortunately snowballs.

    2. I think there is a difference between being outright rude and mean spirited, and tempers flaring. Tempers do flare and things get out of hand at times, which is why I needed to write up a comment policy, but none of the regular commentators are outright rude and mean spirited. The few people who have been outright rude and mean spirited toward me, the blog, and the commentators are people who post once and are never heard from again. They rile people up and then leave. I believe that’s what they call an internet troll.

      1. Remember the wild troll that was posting the death theories…can’t remember if it was when she was pregnant with George or Charlotte. At first we all tried “talking it down from the tree”, but dang thing just wanted it’s crazy say and we had to run it off. by the end we were all “Don’t feed the troll!!!” That ended up being kind of funny, looking back 🙂

        1. I remember that one. They thought Kate died during childbirth with Charlotte and that they replaced her or something. That one was weird.

  23. I don’t regularly comment on here, but I do read KMR’s blog rather regularly, and now and then drop a line or two. Why? Sanity check. I couldn’t possibly be the only one in the world who thinks something is wrong with the way the Cambridges are handling their PR, could I? Am I the only one who finds it crass the way Kate, and her family, revolve their lives around William? Am I the only one to see that? Apparently not. In here, I found others with like minds; who value substance over image, see virtue in work – paid or unpaid/voluntary – and passion for a cause above oneself over mere celebrity-ism.

  24. I agree with many of the comments in response to why we follow and criticize W&K. For me, it’s not about escapism, but more so it’s a way for me to try to make sense of the way things sometimes work in the world. Kate is in a position where she married into the highest society, wealth and power. She accepted with that the obligation to the commonwealth to perform her duty. She has such an amazing platform but over the past 4 years she has lowered the bar so much and time after time has mucked things up — nude images, flubbing short speeches, canceling events, taking long and luxurious vacations and breaks in between brief scattered engagements…and the list goes on. It blows my mind that their vast public reputation is built solely on PR and the real truth of how they really live is hidden from the world.

    I’m also blown away by how luxuriously they live at the expense of everyone else. They pay for nothing and get everything. Free vacations under the guise of royal tours, private flights from their connections, clothing the don’t pay for, security, cars for their family, royalties from pictures of their kids they’ve taken, millions of pounds spent renovating their homes…and that list goes on.

    Will and kate, in my book, are takers. I believe in a meritocracy — that when you work hard, you will be rewarded. I believe that when you lie and fake and pretend to be someone who you are not that ultimately that will catch up with you.

    I don’t care about things like clothes and winglets and veneers and makeup. I just want to see them caring and giving back in a genuine way because they have gotten SO MUCH just from a title. That’s what I’m looking for. It doesn’t make sense in my book of life.

    1. I agree with that too. Which is why I believe they should ‘earn’ their enormous keep by doing what is traditionally expected of British royals, which is to carry out a full schedule of ‘engagements,’ meeting the public, encouraging people, celebrating people’s achievements, etc. As many of us have said many times on this blog, showing up for an hour or two to open a factory or visit a mental health clinic, a couple times a week, is not very hard at all. The Duchess makes it seem like an ungodly hassle of the first order.

      1. It is an ungodly hassle for her because she’s never worked an actual job a day in her life. Outside of landing William, anything she’s done that could be considered work has been more play for her. The ship deal where she walked around in her too short shorts, Jigsaw was a joke. I doubt she actually placed an order for anything. Probably just looked at a few pictures, spent time texting her mom and William and then went home. She’ll never fully appreciate what it means to have to work a job.

  25. Did you guys see Will and Kate are now going to the new Bond premiere in October? What a life to be a royal, lol. I know Kate is making a bunch of appearances this fall but so far most of them seem like fluff appearances vs charity/meaningful things. They seem more like celebrities than royals lately.

    1. So far Kate has 1 charity appearance (that’s not actually for one of her charities but it is for a center that actually helps people), and the rest are fluff appearances. Lots of rugby and a film premiere. They really need to sign her up for more charity appearances.

      1. I guess people are happy with her just making appearances. No one really cares if they have substance or not, just as long as we see her :(. It is never really pointed out that if she makes like 6 appearances, only one of those is for a charity while the other 5 are celebrity appearances. It sure seems like she doesn’t want to work with many charities.

    2. Regarding Action on Addiction, the last time Kate visited one of their charities was in Feb of 2013, however she did manage to attend a gala for them in October 2014. When she first became patron of Action on Addiction I was quite thrilled having seen first hand the devastating effects addiction can have on the individual and their families. I felt that she realized as well the effects that addiction can have on young children growing up in homes with struggling adults and her patronage could help shed light on this devastating disease. But it seems that this issue is too difficult for her, she might actually meet people who are real and suffering. And one simply can’t have that. After years of coddling by her mother and William I think these fluff appearances are all she can handle. And frankly since she can’t manage a short speech or keep her skirt from flying up I’d rather have her just keep to the easy assignments.

      1. It does seem like addiction is too much for her. She and her team want something no one can object to, so they go for the children’s charities.

        1. It does. But if she wanted something no one objected to, why not become a patron of arts organizations? She has an upper second honours degree in art history and is already a paper patron of the National Portrait Gallery and the Natural History Museum. Many arts supporters have (fairly or not) criticized the Queen for not being a greater enthusiast of the arts. Why didn’t Catherine take over something like the Royal Academy of Music from the Duchess of Gloucester, who’s nearly 70 or the Royal Academy of Art? Why not be the patron of the Royal Philharmonic? She could show up in a £30,000 dress and £5,000 hairdo, play with her hair as the President or CEO shakes her hand, flash the photographers as she walks in, yawn at the playing of the National Anthem, play Candy Crush on her iPhone during the performance, get home to put Prince George to bed and still have it count as at least 3 separate engagements. It would be made so easy for her she couldn’t possibly screw up.

  26. It had to be said and you said it, KMR. You had to intervene and lay down the ground rules for your site, especially in light of trolls who also come in and stir up the pot from time to time. I think everyone here understands where you’re coming from and are in full agreement with you.

    You run a wonderful, informative and entertaining blog and don’t ever think otherwise. We all prefer coming here to escape “far from the madding crowd” of sycophancy and rampant hatred from the other extreme Kate sites.

  27. The thing about these fluff appearances is that they made this big announcement about how they didn’t want to do the celebrity filled things and that’s all they are basically doing. William is becoming an expert at talking out of both sides of his mouth.

    1. Just saw the DM article, as per usual there was a photo of Kate with a flash of her upper thigh. Did she forget to do up the buttons on the lower part of her dress? Yikes!

        1. Just read the DM piece, too.
          Where to begin?

          Why does she always have to reveal a bit of leg? I think she needs a dressing down from the powers above. Truly, that is in such poor taste. She seems to love showing off her fit body. She is very fit, I will say, but in her role, I would assume a bit more modesty is in order.

          Her expressions were a bit overdone, too. My take is that she is nervous when she attends these events and overcompensates by smiling way too much.

          The bangs? Terrible! Not flattering to her at all. That one photo where the wind blew them up was terrible. I felt sorry for her.

          If this issue — mental illness in children — is something she will pursue, I commend her. I hope she does more than these breezy visits to center, though. More substantial involvement would mean much more.

          Why was she an hour late, btw? That’s truly uncalled for.

      1. Oh, yes. Why do we always get a flashing of some kind? I just think she thinks far too highly of her appearance. Sorry, but I do.

        I didn’t like the bangs, either. It’s not a flattering look.

        Well, she made an appearance. Kudos, Kate. Hope there was a sincere interest in the work the Anna Freud Centre is doing. Hope there is a continued amount of work in a cause she is interested in pursuing. Sorry, I can’t get all hyped up over this.

        I’m heading back to the Harry post. Those photos were a great way to start the morning.

        1. I looove that Ralph Lauren dress. The added belt is perfection. However, she needed a slip underneath. That’s what happens when you wear a shirtdress.

          I will say this, that she’s looking thinner and it makes her face look like it’s sunken and sallow. l hope she’s well.

          I love it when her hair is darker. I think that an inch off the bottom would be good. I still maintain that she has extensions. Natural hair blows on the wind. Weaves stay put, lol.

          She’s headed in the right direction.

          1. It appears the dress is lined. You can see the black fabric in certain pictures. That should help somewhat in keeping it weighted down…obviously not completely 😉

    2. Exactly my thoughts:
      Manic grin in place. Stick thin.

      That is one of the most unflattering hairstyles ever!
      (if I was doubting chopping off a few centimeters, thanks Kate, you have given me the push I needed 😛 )
      And being so stick thin takes all the sexy, feminine and enviable away from her. I’m truly sorry to body-shame, Kate should gain a few pounds, seriously.

      And I can’t understand how that dowdy dress manages to still show more then what is appropriate – thigh.

      1. I thought the dress was dowdy, too. Just did not care for it.
        Kate’s taste in clothing just doesn’t do it for me. She is into very safe looks, which is fine, but then don’t let the wind take advantage of things!
        For some reason, I think the other Royals of Europe are far better in their choices of clothes. Very couture — yet not showy.

        Kate’s hair cut is not flattering to her. I always dislike the flat look on most women. A bit of height is flattering to many faces.

        I thought Kate looked boring. Maybe, that’s why she flashed a little thigh.

  28. Hi KMR, sorry to read it got to the point where you had to address this in a post. I hope that doesn’t discourage you in the lightest to continue with this blog. I too used to visit a Kate blog where all the sugars crazy fawned over Kate and where my opinion always warranted “tomatoes being thrown at me” XD I was super happy to find your corner on the internet and I greatly enjoy your blog.

    I don’t comment as much as I would want because I am not as fast on my tablet (and rarely have time when I’m on the PC) but I read every single post 🙂 you do a great job!

    I’m thinking things get extremely heated when Kate *isn’t around* because those already annoyed by her behavior/lifestyle feel even more aggravated and the sugars decide to come out and defend with their spear :p As someone suggested, perhaps directing our attention to other royal households would help…

    In terms of their nicknames, I don’t mind them. Quite often I am entertained by the wit of the writer and find it funny. While we (commenters) are critical of Kate I do think we can see when something good deserves a thumbs-up (yeah, rarely does she warrant it) and I have also seen you take that stance. At the same time, as much as we might dislike her/her lifestyle/behavior I think none on this blog wish any calamity upon Will and Katie.

    1. I feel you about not being able to type fast on a tablet. I much prefer commenting when I’m on my laptop than on my phone. I had an older iPhone and it was a huge pain, and took forever, to type on it. My new iPhone is better but I still prefer the laptop because I am much faster on it.

  29. I think this policy is fair. I have a question though, if I may please have the web addresses of the Kate bashing forums and blogs so I may visit there when I’m feeling particularly hostile? Lol thanks 🙂

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