I was starting to read this article marking Kate’s 1,000 days as a Duchess and I kept commenting in my head about too many things to count, so I thought instead of giving an overall impression and using a few quotes here and there I’d just bullet point quotes and give my thoughts.

Quick set up:  Kate Middleton has been the Duchess of Cambridge for 1,000 days, as of today, 23 January 2014.  During those 1,000 days, Kate has done a total of 189 engagements/appearances.  About a third of those appearances have come from overseas tours to Canada/LA and SE Asia.  Those numbers are the numbers of engagements, not the number of working days.  There are many times, especially on overseas tours, where there are multiple engagements in one day.  So Kate hasn’t even worked a full 189 days of her 1,000 day tenure as a Duchess.

I will quote the article, then break with a “—“ and then begin my thoughts.  Let’s begin:

*  “It will no doubt be business as usual: looking after her young son, chatting with the housekeeper and nanny about domestic duties and holding discussions with her private secretary about official duties.”  —  But not actually doing any official duties.

*  “She is learning how to be a working mother.”  —  Pretty sure she has to actually work to be qualified and/or learn how to be a working mother.

*  “Some question that phrase ‘working mother’, choosing to see a woman living in luxury, doing the occasional public engagement.”  —  Yes, because that’s the image Kate gives the public by not actually doing anything.

*  “But those closest to her see a steely, caring, intelligent person anxious to make a difference in the world.”  —  Then why doesn’t she f-cking do anything?!?!?!?!!

*  “With the Queen’s blessing, she and William have until now avoided working full time on royal duties.”  —  The Queen never actually said anything to this affect, the press made it up because William still had two years left on his RAF contract when he married Kate.

*  “[T]he pitfalls that meant William’s mother, Princess Diana, and aunt, Sarah, Duchess of York were in doomed relationships after spending so much time apart from their husbands.”  —  I don’t think the time apart was what doomed their marriages.  Diana and Charles’ marriage was doomed because he never intended to treat his wife with respect and constantly cheated on her and treated her like a walking womb, and when her job (producing the heir and the spare) was done he threw her away.  No matter how much time they spent together those underlying issues would not have been fixed.

*  “[William] has been looking into the possibility of postponing fulltime royal duties for at least another couple of years by performing some as yet undefined public service role possibly in a Government department or working for a charity.”  —  Unless his government role is entry-level, William doesn’t deserve it.  He isn’t really qualified for anything requiring experience.  But none of that matters because if William does take a public service role like one Richard Palmer is suggesting, it will just be an excuse so he doesn’t have to do full-time royal duties.  I doubt he would actually be doing much—just like his other “jobs”.

*  “[C]ourtiers anticipate Kate stepping up her royal duties in 2014, starting with a handful of engagements in February.”  —  The palace website doesn’t show any engagements on the calendar for Kate in the coming month.  I would love to know what her “handful of engagements” are.

*  “’I think she is just completely dedicated,’ says her biographer Marcia Moody, in sharp contrast to those critics who deride Kate’s work ethic.”  —  Of course her biographer would say that!  Her biographer wants a job, she’s not going to bad mouth her pay check.  Also, if Kate is so dedicated, why the f-ck doesn’t she show it by actually doing anything?!?!?!??!!!  They can talk all they want about how dedicated Kate is and how she wants to make a difference, but if she never does anything then all that talk is meaningless.  Actions speak louder than words.  If Kate actually worked for her charities and for the public, then the palace/press wouldn’t have to say how dedicated she is, because we would all see that.

*  “’[Charles] wants a monarchy fit for the 21st century and that means people earning their keep,’ said one senior royal source.”  —  Kate earns her keep?  Since when?

*  “Kate has picked causes that she feels passionately about.”  —  I really doubt this, because if she actually cared she would pay attention when she visited, and would actually visit more than once or twice a year.  It’s not like she has so many charities that she can only squeeze in one or two visits to each one a year.  She has 9.  And that includes being patron of two museums and the Royal Foundation of the Duke and Duchess of Cambridge and Prince Harry.  If she really cared that much she could do so much for those few charities she has, but she just doesn’t.

So, all in all, this whole article is a PR fluff piece designed to make Kate look good and/or account for the fact that she hasn’t done much in the 1,000 days she’s been a Duchess.  Congratulations, Richard Palmer, on being a palace mule.  And Congratulations, Kate Middleton, for running the ultimate con on the Royal Family, the press, and the public.